#newmom Baby Essentials List

Like most Moms-to-be I read a few (hundred) lists online on blogs and Mom-sites of the 'essentials' we needed to get before 'new baby' arrived. Buggy, baby bath, car seat - that sort of stuff. 50% of the stuff you do actually need and the other 50% is optional or can wait a few months. Like a baby bath. For the first month (unless you have a big baby!) a washing up bowl will do.

But there are some things that you need that are not often listed on these sites, probably because they are boring, or aren't sponsored by a manufacturer (a little bit cycnical? Maybe). The sort of stuff you'll want to buy in bulk or have a stock of in some cases. So here's my new mom/baby essentials list to compliment all the kit and caboodle lists out there.

1. Liquid hand soap - no joke but you will be washing your hands more often than before. Get something antibacterial that is kind to your hands, and smells nice. I like Carex and often buy it when it is on offer. 
2. Hand cream - all that hand washing will dry your hands, however kind the hand soap is! Treat yourself to a tube of intensive hand cream like Crabtree and Evelyn Hand Therapy in La Source. A little goes a very long way. Or Lansinoh Nipple Cream works wonders on really dry cracked skin.
3. A lidded dirty bucket - actually you want a clean bucket to put 'dirty' baby clothes in after a poo incident. This was a tip from my Mom and I ignored it at first but you know what I'm glad I saw sense. You do not want to carry sodden poo soaked onesies round the house, or dump them in the regular laundry pail with the 'unsoiled' laundry. You'll also want a dedicated bucket to soak them in for a prewash too. You can pick up a small lidded bucket up from Amazon for just a couple of £.
4. Non-bio laundry detergent - buy in bulk as the last thing you want to do after coming home from hospital is run to the shops for detergent. You'll probably do a load of laundry every other day at best and to avoid reactions you should use a non-bio detergent on babyg's clothes. Fairy do good non-bio detergent and I've now switched the whole family laundry over to this.
5. Dishwasher tablets - again, you do not want to have to go out and pick these up in the first week and if you want mugs to serve tea and coffee for all the family and friends coming to coo over your little one make sure you are stocked up. You will not have the time, energy, or in fact care to stand over the sink handwashing cup as and saucers. If you don't have a dishwasher then insist guests wash up their mug (and a few pots and pans if going spare) before they leave, just to help out.
6. Pet food - if you have pets that is. You'll be busy feeding baby, then yourself, and the pets will be last in the food chain. Get a stash of their favourite food in and some treats - new babies can really unsettle a pet so if you can show them love through a bowl of tuna/kibble it'll avoid any protest parcels...
7. Carpet and upholstery cleaner - for said protest parcels from pets, baby sick, Poozooka splashes...... Vanish do a good spray on version that you just rub/brush in.
8. Family size chocolate bars - Cadburys, Galaxy, you know the ones. I really didn't understand why I was given them at my baby shower, until Mr New Mom went back to work after paternity leave. When you don't have time to eat grabbing a few squares of chocolate will carry you through. No it's not healthy but you can make up for it with extra vegetables at dinner. But the big thing is there will be times you will be so exasperated and eating a whole family bar of Dairy Milk will be required. Hormones can be a really b*tch but chocolate is the next best thing to a hug.
9. Posh body wash - again I was given this at my baby shower and on the rare occasion I get the opportunity to have a nice long shower this is my treat. Again a little goes a long way and come on, when are you really going to make it to the spa next? It'll be at least 6 weeks before you'll be swimming pool ready and in reality I'm betting on 12 weeks before I personally feel body confident and ready to lie on my front post c-section for a massage. So a little luxury shower gel like something from Elemis or Clarins is relaxation in a bottle. Trust me.
10. Super comfy PJs - whether you plan to or not there will be pyjama days. I am convinced Kate Middleton (why do we still call her that agpfter the wedding?) has them. You want to feel comfortable and honestly, there is nothing better than snuggling up with 'new baby' in your PJs, you know, once they have stopped crying, pooping, puking. It's how you stay friends when things are tough.

So there you have it. My Top 10 essentials to compliment all the baby gear you will want to stock up on.

What to do when baby sleeps

'Sleep when the baby sleeps.'

It's a lie.

You don't.

It's a very good idea to (trust me, you will really want to, especially in the very first weeks) but in all honesty what you do when your baby sleeps is a minefield of choices and they are all as equally important as sleeping.

Like taking a shower. When you haven't showered in a week and your legs are fuzzy, knowing you have at least 20-30 mins in which you could take a shower makes taking a nap verses feeling clean and fresh a difficult toss up. Put baby safely in their crib/Moses basket, leave the bathroom door open, and jump in the shower.

Or eating. You need to eat. Ok so skipping meals might seem a great idea for losing the baby weight fast (no, it's not a good idea) but it won't leave you with the energy to look after your baby. You'll be cranky, more tired, get a headache etc etc. What can you rustle up and eat in 20mins? Beans on toast, cheese on toast, a salad, pasta and sauce, a jacket potato? Feed baby, feed Momma.

Expressing. If you're breastfeeding you might be expressing so that you can store milk for later, be that for months down the line (yeah, frozen breastmilk keeps for 6mths in the freezer!) or that evening so you can bottle feed. It's really difficulty to express when your baby is awake and it's just the two of you. Grab the opportunity when baby sleeps!

Laundry. Again, they say the chores can wait but honestly if you're like me they can't. Especially when it comes to having enough clean underwear. It's the one load of laundry I prioritise other than 'new baby's' clothes. Even when the rest of your outfit smells faintly of milky sick you'll still feel comfortable in the knowledge you have clean underwear on.

Checking baby is breathing. And then checking again. Yes, we've all done it and it prevents you from napping for more than 5 mins at a time. You get yourself into a vicious cycle and before you know it baby is awake and your golden opportunity for a snooze is gone. After about 6 weeks you start to just listen out for their breathing instead. Yeah, ok, I'm not being very helpful with this one I know. I'm still doing it myself after all.

But if you can sleep DO IT.

Blogging is therapy

So it's 11pm and 'new baby' is asleep. Time to settle down myself right? Except I can't because once again there is another burning question I just need to Google about bringing up baby. This time it's about swimming - when can I start taking 'new baby' to the pool, what do I need, what do they wear, how warm does the water need to be.... The questions are relentless and so is quite frankly the advice out there. The internet is not short of a baby or Mommy blog that's for sure.

So here's one more. Except I don't plan to sugar coat this one. No gloss. Pregnancy, having a baby, and those early days, weeks and months are tough and I wish someone had told me just how tough it can be and that its ok to have a cry every now and again. It's even ok to ask for help. And most certainly it is ok to want a hug from your own Mom.

After a difficult birth experience I ended up with Postnatal Depression (PND) and as a writer I've decided that a little blogging during the first year of 'new baby's' life will be a small form of therapy and hopefully perhaps a support to other #newmoms out there. If anything it should be an honest, sometimes humourours, and occasionally helpful insight to being a new Mom.

So whilst 'new baby' sleeps and Mr New Mom catches up on some work I will blog about our adventures and escapades (because you know, I'm expecting a lot of high jinx over the next year!). Everything from Poozookas (yes it's a real phenomenon) to going out and forgetting the chassis to the buggy (hey, we remembered to the baby!). But to make each post helpful I'm gonna include a top tip as a result of what we've learnt.

So tomorrow 'new baby' and I are heading to the park with the Mom and Baby group. We'll let you know how we get on.....!